Because of the Adversity I Faced in Childhood, There’s Nothing I Can’t Do!

Because of the Adversity I Faced in Childhood, There’s Nothing I Can’t Do!

A 16-year-old who grew up experiencing adversity in childhood said this to Brian Martin several years ago, and he included her story in his book, Invincible: The 10 Lies You Learn Growing Up With Domestic Violence and the Truths to Set You Free. Thinking about this statement raises an interesting question. Why do so few who experience adversity in childhood believe the same thing that this young...

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Can Adversity in Childhood Create Emotional Strength?

Can Adversity in Childhood Create Emotional Strength?

The same adversities you faced in your childhood home that led you to believe LIES about yourself also allowed you to develop skills and abilities that others don't have. These skills -- or gifts -- are inside each of you and are found by replacing the LIES you learned with the TRUTHS. And while the process of uncovering these gifts may differ from one person to the next, without question,...

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How Do We Unlearn the Lies Learned in Childhood?

How Do We Unlearn the Lies Learned in Childhood?

Every day we have opportunities to unlearn lies we may have learned. Many of the lies that we believe about ourselves were seeded in childhood. Especially if you grew up in violent home. A home in which the violence could have been physical or nonphysical. Those opportunities may not always be obvious, however. They are hard to spot. Here we will explore an example of how one man took notice of...

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The Unsung Gifts of Adversity

The Unsung Gifts of Adversity

No one wishes to have had a difficult or painful childhood. Such adversity scars people for life. Yet if you grew up living with domestic violence, you were forced to develop skills, awareness and abilities that can set you up for immense success now and into your future. I call these the "unsung gifts of adversity," and here I want to explore how growing up with domestic violence can also make...

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What Unknown Special Skill Do Those who Experience Childhood Domestic Violence Have Access To?

What Unknown Special Skill Do Those who Experience Childhood Domestic Violence Have Access To?

“I understand that I cannot control the thoughts and actions of others. But I can exercise the ultimate control – control over the meaning of any situation – control over myself. When I am in control of my thoughts and my feelings and my actions, nothing is more powerful.” (INVINCIBLE: The 10 Lies You Learn Growing Up With Domestic Violence, and the Truths to Set You Free, Chapter 6). You have...

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What Is the One Truth You Must Know?

What Is the One Truth You Must Know?

“The worst guilt to accept is an undeserved guilt.” –Ayn Rand, Atlas ShruggedIf you grew up living with domestic violence, it is highly likely that you carry with you a false sense of GUILT – a false sense of shame. You believe that you are somehow guilty or that you have something to be ashamed of. That it was your fault.Let’s look at it more specifically.The LIE: You are somehow responsible...

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Compassion is a Gift You Earned if You Grew Up Living with Domestic Violence

Compassion is a Gift You Earned if You Grew Up Living with Domestic Violence

Only those who have suffered can truly understand what suffering feels like. If you grew up in a home with domestic violence, you understand suffering. Because you endured this pain and fear as a child, you have a unique gift: an enormous capacity for compassion. You Are Uniquely Designed You have endured far more hardship in childhood than most people will ever have to face. You know what it’s...

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A 3 Simple Question Test to Determine If You Grew Up Living with Domestic Violence

A 3 Simple Question Test to Determine If You Grew Up Living with Domestic Violence

Did you grow up in a home living with domestic violence? That question doesn't get asked very often, but we must ask it of ourselves and of those we care about. Because if the answer is yes, you should know that it has an impact on a life.    1.   Did your parents or those who cared for you hurt one another physically? You were there, you saw it, heard it, you felt it. Even if they weren’t...

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Growing Up with Domestic Violence Makes You Stronger

When I tell people that I grew up in a home where there was severe domestic violence, I get a few different reactions. For some, it’s pity – “Oh. poor you. How did you ever survive that?” For others, it’s disbelief – “But how could you have grown up like that? You’re so confident and self assured.” There are also those people who, upon finding out about my childhood, treat me as if I’ve been...

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Ordinary Magic: Resilience Processes in Development

Ordinary Magic: Resilience Processes in Development

By Ann MastenAnn Masten's study of resilience in development reveals surprising conclusions on the "ordinariness of resilience" - "Resilience does not come from rare and special qualities, but from the everyday magic of ordinary, normative human resources in the minds, brains, and bodies of children, in their families and relationships, and in their communities." Read more HERE

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The circular impact of ACEs, education, and long-term health

The circular impact of ACEs, education, and long-term health

“The field of public health recognizes education is a social determinant of health” says Shanta Dube, Ph.D., Associate Professor at Georgia State University and CDVA Georgia Chapter Board member. Health studies have shown that U.S. adults who faced Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) are likely to report less education, as ACEs cause negative social and behavioral outcomes. And reversely,...

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How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime | Nadine Burke Harris

How childhood trauma affects health across a lifetime | Nadine Burke Harris

Pediatrician Nadine Burke began to see patterns among the children she treated in her practice. She noticed a large percentage of children coming in with the same symptoms and false diagnosis. As a doctor with a string commitment to public health, she began to look for similarities among these children and discovered something striking - what they all had in common were Adverse Childhood...

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Bad childhood experiences can make us unhealthy

Bad childhood experiences can make us unhealthy

By Daniel WeintraubDaniel Weintraub of the Sacramento Bee recaps the ACE study, and discusses its widening influence in the medical community. When it first came out, very little about medical practice was adjusted. Now doctors will discuss ACE's with their patients, and more of them are recommending mindfulness meditation as a coping strategy. Read Weintraub's article...

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How Does CDV- Childhood Domestic Violence – Impact a Life?

How Does CDV- Childhood Domestic Violence – Impact a Life?

Childhood domestic violence is what happens to any person who grows up in a home living with domestic violence in their childhood. UNICEF calls it “one of the most pervasive human rights issues of our time.”Domestic violence from a childhood standpoint is when there is violence between parents or when there is violence toward a parent – perhaps from a stepparent or a significant other.The...

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The Impact Adversity in Your Childhood Home Has on Your Pursuit of Life, Liberty and Happiness

The Impact Adversity in Your Childhood Home Has on Your Pursuit of Life, Liberty and Happiness

By Brian F. Martin, Author of INVINCIBLEOur founding fathers believed everyone was "endowed by our creator with certain unalienable rights; among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness." This principle also applies to anyone who grew up facing adversity in their childhood home.But, while we may have been "endowed" with these rights at birth, the home we grow up in can have a...

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Bad childhood experiences can make us unhealthy

Bad childhood experiences can make us unhealthy

By Daniel WeintraubDaniel Weintraub of the Sacramento Bee recaps the ACE study, and discusses its widening influence in the medical community. When it first came out, very little about medical practice was adjusted. Now doctors will discuss ACE's with their patients,...

Giving Teachers the Tools to Help Build Resiliency

Giving Teachers the Tools to Help Build Resiliency

A teacher writes on a chalkboard during a class at the Korean High School in Tokyo, Japan, on Thursday, Sept. 25, 2014. The school in Tokyo’s Kita ward looks much like any such Japanese institution with a large clock sitting atop of gray buildings. Inside, all notices...

Why I Chose to Share My Story in CDV’s Book INVINCIBLE

What I Gained from Reading About CDV in INVINCIBLE

By Roger “ROCK” Lockridge, Guest Blogger and contributor to INVINCIBLEIt’s very likely that most of you reading this blog have been directly affected by what we now know as Childhood Domestic Violence (CDV) or you know someone who has. If that is the case, I hope you...

Why Children Stay Silent About Domestic Violence

Why Children Stay Silent About Domestic Violence

By CDVThose who have never experienced domestic violence may sometimes question why a child would stay silent when living in such a home. Children don’t usually talk about it, though. They are afraid they may get into trouble. Or they fear that one of their parents...

The Adversity Faced in Childhood That Has No Name

Did you know that growing up facing adversity in your childhood home has an impact on your life that can last well into your adult years? The adversity negatively wires a developing brain. This can cause us to struggle with our relationships, emotions, behaviors, and...

What Is Childhood Domestic Violence?

What Is Childhood Domestic Violence?

Most people have heard the words domestic violence. They know what it is, or at the very least, they are aware it exists.When we say “domestic violence” the words that most typically come to mind are women, abuse, pain, and violence. Children rarely come to mind. Less...

How Trauma Rewires the Brain

How Trauma Rewires the Brain

Experiencing trauma can significantly rewire the brain, as hormones are released in excess due to stress. Fortunately, therapy can provide an understanding of emotions, helping to restore balance to the brain. This article features input from Licensed Psychologist and...

ACE Study

ACE Study

By Vincent FelittiThis is the original Adverse Childhood Experience study, which first brought this health issue to the attention of the medical community. Much of the research done on this topic was inspired by this groundbreaking achievement. the language and...

A New Understanding of the Childhood Brain

A New Understanding of the Childhood Brain

The lifelong impact of toxic stress caused by childhood adversity, like CDV, can have a lasting and profound impact on people into adulthood. By spreading awareness about CDV we can minimize that impact and create positive change. This short animation by The Atlantic...